CUTTING THROUGH THE CLUTTER

The perennial confusion as to what males should look for in a woman can be dispelled by instead understanding exactly what the intents should be in the first place..

 

Future stability

If we didn’t care about the ‘future’, our dating and love lives would be different. We would simply wakeup in the morning, go about our life and randomly hook up with someone for some romantic pleasure, then go around our merry ways respectively. Most of us are concerned with the future- and yes- it is the driving force behind the concept of relationship, yet it is seldom talked about and there is little education on this topic with respect to dating and relationships.

So let’s break the mould and start addressing it. Because, understanding and creating ‘future’ makes a lot of things much less difficult.

 There comes a point when you start working together as a team pursuing mutual goals- house, car, boat, vacations, kids, etc. the thing we have to remember about is that the process of working together as a team is more important than the things we obtain as a team. Teamwork is like a ‘glue’ that holds a couple together. Sometimes when a couple achieves some of the goals that are the objects of their teamwork, they forget to replace it with new goals. Sooner or later, if you don’t replace old goals with new ones, you run out of things to work together on. I’ve seen so often a couple who gets engaged, married, has children, gets a nice house and car- then stop setting goals and their teamwork disappears.

   Sometimes, it doesn’t even go that far. Sometimes, they both have a simple goal like moving in together. They do that and stop creating projects.

 Like the need to continue to do the things you need to attract woman, working together to achieve goals and solve problems is the expanded foundation of relationship.

Goals don’t always have to be mutual goals. Sometimes a couple helps each other on personal goals. They work together as a team to get her to lose 10 pounds. They work together as team to get him a better job. Doing that creates a relationship in a healthy manner. Telling your girl : You’d better lose 10 pounds or I am out of here’ doesn’t.

    Telling the guy he’d better get a better job or you are gone doesn’t create a relationship either. These kinds of attitudes make you enemies or opponents rather than teammates.

Mutual goals are common opponents- these make you teammates in fighting against obstacles towards achieving your goals.. Continually setting goals and working on those goals as a team helps to create a relationship. Stop doing this and the relationship will start falling apart or drifting away.